can't say

daddy told me to cheer up and all it matters is just time
I told daddy that he doesn't understand, then he agreed
he said these are the 4 precious years for me to think about a lot of stuff.
I objected it, because, as I said, I don't mean to think about those things.

It's merely a month, but life is still very heavily caged.
Listening to your sibling's width of freedom all day might not be the most pleasant thing to do..
of course it is indeed a good deed to share happiness with those you are close with, that I hold no objections..
but Forgive me to say that waiting is the most painful process in your life.
now everything turns sick and life as usual doesn't glow
with more workload piling up, fragments turn from orange to blue to red then to gray
My head starts spinning and nothing else would be affected

Then daddy said that at least I have internet
I said "technologies leave you nothing else but numbness"

..